Month: January 2017

The Culture That’s Closer Than You Think

Posted on January 16, 2017 by - Articles, Diversity, Leading Others, Relational Intelligence, Team Building

Surprisingly, interactions with people from different regions within the United States often require cross-cultural skills.

They couldn’t hide it. Their eyes darted around the table to each other. Smiles were restrained or at least covered with a surreptitious move of the hand. I had crossed the line again without fully realizing it.

“I said ‘y’all’ again, didn’t I?”

Nods, grins, smiles, even a snort of laughter, broke through the repressed amusement and we were finally able to get on with the meeting. Forty minutes later, I walked away with two emerging truths echoing through my mind: 1) Never say “y’all” to Minnesotans and 2) “Cultural differences” aren’t always international in nature.

When I listened to Erin Meyer at the 2016 Global Leadership Summit, I was absolutely intrigued by her insightful observations about communicating across cultures. However, I wasn’t convinced that it would connect to much of my daily life. In my role with the Willow Creek Association, I travel to different host site locations primarily located in the Midwest region of the United States – a region not particularly known for its rich cultural diversity.

Or so I thought.

Over the past six months, I’ve been stunned at the distinctions and differences that exist between Americans who live in the same country, residents who live in the same state and even citizens who live in the same town. If your area of leadership or line of work deals with regional offices or nationwide delivery of products and services, then you already know what I’m talking about.

A river that runs through a city isn’t just geography, it often cuts across the city culture like a knife, separating “us” and “them.”

An accent doesn’t just identify you; it can typecast you into a regional perception of “those kinds of people.”

Starting a meeting on time makes you “efficient” in some places, “late” in others, and “militant” in others.

Leaders, it’s simply a mistake to take a “one size fits all” approach, even within your own culture. If you’ve ever run into this phenomenon, or have a role like mine that regularly brings you into contact with people from across different regions (or cultures), here are four tips that have helped me navigate the differences that are literally all around us.

1) Enjoy. Don’t enforce.

The truth is we all have our own leanings when it comes to cultural do’s and don’ts. The key is being able to recognize yours and at the same time not to judge or look down on someone else’s. One of the best ways I’ve learned to do this is by choosing to enjoy the uniqueness of wherever I am and whomever I’m with.

For example, I grin whenever I hear a Minnesotan say, “Doncha know?” (or basically any syllable with “oh” in it) just like they smirk at my “y’alls”. When I’m in Texas, I graciously accept every TexMex meal I’m treated to, and delight in the fact that it only comes in one size: Gigantic.

I don’t need to enforce my personal norms – being with another culture is a chance to stumble across differences and savor them. Sometimes the differences create friction, but I find if I approach them with the predetermined choice to have fun and enjoy it, I navigate through friction faster because I’m not forcing other people to perform according to my preferences.

2) Listen. Don’t lecture.

When I’m with an individual or a group from a different region or culture, I consciously try to adjust my ratio of listening vs. speaking. There’s so much you can learn from the people you’re with if you’ll make a deliberate attempt to listen to them.

What priorities matter to them? What are their values, concerns and ideas about the matter we’re discussing? We may not always have the luxury of hours to meet and discuss these things, but you’d be surprised by what you can pick up in 20 minutes by choosing to ask questions that draw out their responses and then simply listening.

3) Respect. Don’t replicate.

Probably the biggest mistake you can make is to try and emulate someone else’s culture. It’s like trying to copy someone’s accent – they recognize it immediately and it only highlights that you “aren’t from around here.”

While there’s room for respecting what they value (be it timeliness, personal space or how they use email), there’s no need to copycat them. What almost every culture values (certainly in the United States) is authenticity. In short, they don’t want you to be them – they want the actual you – but they are looking for someone who “gets them.” In other words, someone who appreciates or enjoys them for who they are. (Sound familiar? See my first point).

4) Eat together whenever possible.

Sorry to break the rhythm of the previous three principles, but in my experience, one of the fastest ways around cultural roadblocks (international, regional or otherwise) is to share a meal together. No matter who you are or where you’re from, everybody eats. To sit at a table and eat together emphasizes our humanness and our similarities. It’s often a chance for the locals to show off their cuisine – yet another chance to enjoy and celebrate them for who they are. (And you never know, you may just end up with a new favorite dish!)

While there are undoubtedly more tips to add to the list, I find these four have become a traveling “playbook” that are easy to remember and employ on the fly.

Regardless of the approach you take, the truth is there’s a world of cultural differences out there, and they are always closer than you think – maybe even just across the street. As leaders, we have the unique opportunity to embrace the distinctives while finding the common ground we can build on together.

That is, if y’all understand what I’m saying.

Because of the GLS | A Hospital in Spain Serves Beyond Their Walls

Posted on January 16, 2017 by - Because of the GLS, Calling, Europe, Healthcare, Stories, Wellness, Western Europe

As the Global Leadership Summit grows around the world, more people from various sectors of society outside the Church are finding value in taking part in this leadership event. Not only are teams from the Church being equipped and encouraged, but more teams are attending from business, non-profit, government and education sectors.

In early November, the GLS in Spain attracted a 200 person team from The New Evangelical Hospital of Barcelona.

With a vision to treat patients holistically in both body and spirit, hospital Director Reyes Gualda used the GLS to equip her 200 person staff with the leadership skills required to accomplish this vision. Her team included the hospital leadership team, as well as the entire staff of both believers and non-believers.

“We want to build up a strong team of expert, caring professionals who give back to the patients of our hospital,” Reyes shares. “Our dream is to become a soulful organization with a skilled team that can change the world.”

2After the GLS, Reyes talked about her dream for the hospital to go beyond their borders of their building and their city, and help humanitarian charities provide healthcare and health education in developing countries.

With a commitment to building a great team through the GLS, Reyes believes her Grander Vision will soon come true.

When Cultures Clash

Posted on January 12, 2017 by - Articles, Conflict Management, Diversity, Leading Others

When conversations are difficult, cross-cultural issues can add to the complexity. Our favorite expert in Crucial Conversations, Joseph Grenny, explains an approach to build understanding in these difficult situations. The original post can be found on the Vital Smarts Q&A page here.

Dear Crucial Skills,

Our city has been struggling with a diversity initiative, and we’ve been going through the Crucial Conversations training to help address issues that keep our employees from working together because of cultural misunderstandings.

It’s been interesting to see people’s reactions to the terms “silence” and “violence” used in the training. It seems to be a matter of interpretation. For example, several people from different ethnic backgrounds say that being expressive and emotional is part of their cultural communication style–and yet people from other cultural backgrounds see this strong way of advocating as “violence” in crucial conversations language.

How do you address these differences in the way people define “silence” and “violence” when conversations are happening between people of different cultures?

Signed,
Culture Clash

Dear Culture Clash,

You raise a very important question—and one we’ve thought a great deal about since we’ve worked with these skills literally everywhere from Israeli software companies and Kenyan slums to Malaysian factories and Wall Street investment banks. Here is our considered response.

Your twin responsibilities in a crucial conversation are: 1) to maintain safety; and 2) to engage in and encourage the free flow of meaning.

All of the skills in Crucial Conversations are designed to accomplish these two tasks. Maintaining safety is hard enough when two people come from the same culture. It becomes even more complex when people come from a different culture. The reason is that people from different cultures tell themselves different “stories” about the behavior of others. Using active hand gestures while I speak might be seen as passion in one culture and coercion in another.

For example, I once worked with an Israeli software company that was acting as a vendor to an American telecom company. There were frequent crucial conversational breakdowns as a consequence of the widely different communication patterns used by the Israelis and the Americans. The Israelis were comfortable with relatively louder volume and more vigorous body language. The Midwestern Americans were intimidated and offended by this behavior. The story they told themselves about the behavior was that it was disrespectful and coercive.

How do you solve this problem?

First, by holding the right conversation. Don’t just talk about “content” (key issues you need to address). If you are aware that there could be cultural differences, you should pause occasionally and talk about those differences. Talk about your differing patterns of behavior. Ask people how you are coming across. Encourage them to give you feedback about behaviors that might make it difficult for them to engage with you around crucial topics. Ask them what various patterns of behavior on their part mean to them.

Second, when you are digging into crucial conversations about content, watch for signs that the conversation is not working. Watch for marked changes in others’ behavior or facial expressions. If, for example, they are usually expressive but become silent, you can bet that safety might be at risk. They may be interpreting your behavior as violent when you intend it as something much different. Or, if they become louder than usual, again this is a sign that safety could be at risk and you should step out of the conversation and talk about the conversation. Again, ask for feedback about how you’re coming across—either now or later when it might be safer.

Working across cultures requires the same two sets of regular conversations that working to build any sort of strong relationship requires. The first is healthy crucial conversations about key issues (content or relationship). The second is regular crucial conversations about how to correctly interpret your differing behaviors (pattern).

The reason for the first kind of conversation is obvious. But the need for the second is less so. Many people fail to help their colleagues or loved ones correctly interpret the intent and meaning behind their own behaviors. They leave them open to be interpreted in the worst way possible—often with disastrous consequences.

If you want to work well across cultures, don’t just talk issues, talk behaviors—what they mean and don’t mean–and what works for the both of you.

Thanks for raising an important issue. And best wishes in the vital work you’re doing to bring greater unity and productivity into our wonderfully diverse world,

Joseph

Because of the GLS | A Doctor in Congo Opens a Free Medical Clinic

Posted on January 11, 2017 by - Africa, Because of the GLS, Stories

When Pastor Crispin Mutanda heard Melinda Gates speak at the GLS in the Democratic Republic of the Congo, he was inspired with a vision to do something more for his community.

Pastor Crispin is also a doctor, and despite his limited resources, he decided to organize a medical campaign, providing free first aid and checkups for the people living in poverty in his community.

Thousands of people from the area came to his medical center to receive free treatment. Some of them discovered blood pressure issues they didn’t know they had, and were grateful to the doctor and his staff for their care.

Pastor Crispin plans to continue more medical campaigns to serve his community and save lives in the days to come.

The outcomes of the GLS are truly inspiring. Can you imagine if each person who attended the GLS impacted at least 10 people within their sphere of influence, let alone a couple thousand? The ripple effect would reach more than three million people. You’re a part of something big!