Month: July 2017

The Faulty Assumption Most Leaders Make about EQ

Posted on July 25, 2017 by - Articles, Emotional Intelligence, Leading Yourself, Wellness

The term “emotional intelligence” has gained widespread popularity in leadership circles. This is cause for celebration. For too long, leadership evaluations and decisions have been plagued by tunnel vision, measuring the results of someone’s leadership using only the most surface level metrics: sales growth, church size or attendance, market growth, revenues or profits, number of homeless people fed, etc. However an organization defined “success” was the metric used to measure the effectiveness of a leader, even though it only reflected the superficial numerical results of the mission.

The truth is that all leaders make a bigger impact in another important domain—their “wake” as I like to call it.

A leader’s wake is composed of the ripples and effects of their own emotional expression and how they interact with others. As Travis Bradbury reminded us at last year’s Summit, to be truly effective, a leader must possess awareness of self, awareness of others, and the ability to manage both. That is a much taller order than just “running up the numbers.” It assumes some serious “equipment” inside the leader’s head and heart.

As Peter puts it, “For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” (2 Peter 1:5-8) So, we see that both the Bible and leadership research emphasize the character components that undergird successful performance. The idea behind emotional intelligence is clear: build the equipment in a way that is conducive to emotional intelligence.

But how do we do that? In my experience, many leaders get this wrong.

The sad truth is that many of us start with a faulty assumption. We think we can learn emotional intelligence by way of great content in seminars, or podcasts or books. Nothing could be further from the truth.

The components of emotional intelligence, such as “self-awareness, self-management, relational awareness and relational management” require more than information alone. Gaining those abilities is a process of true emotional development. Many leaders rely too heavily on information, ignoring the necessity of relational and experiential development that would nurture and grow the emotional intelligence they need.

Said another way, leaders need a “process” of development beyond simply consuming information. This process must include developmental relationships with the right people, combined with experiential learning.

1) Leaders need real relationships with others who can first see what they can’t see, make the leader aware of what they can’t see and then to teach and model those new “self and other” skills to that leader to practice in real time. We know from neuroscience that change requires not only awareness, but also relationships that focus on the awareness of how we need to change.

2) Another crucial factor is called “deliberate practice.” This is where the leader can be further made aware of what is needed to manage self and others more effectively, and work it out in real-life situations.

So, my advice in thinking about your own leadership development and the development of the people you steward is this: Gain informational awareness. It is essential.

But also, gain feedback awareness from others about how that information applies to you and your mission, especially stakeholders in your performance. They are the ones who live in your “wake.” Enlist the help of wise and skilled “others” who can help you know what and how you need to change, as well as how to get there through feedback, skills-building and deliberate practice. In that combination of relational support, awareness, focused attention and practice over time in a structured way, literal new equipment will begin to develop in your heart, mind and soul.

And you will do what Peter said: you will avoid being unproductive and ineffective in your leadership work.

God Bless,

Henry

7 Leadership Truths for Parents

Posted on July 24, 2017 by - Because of the GLS, Calling, Diversity, Family, Influence, North America, Stories

When we hear the disheartened words of a woman who says, “I’m not a leader. I’m just a mom,” we’re stirred to respond with, “But moms may have the greatest influence of all!” As mothers, women may feel like they are not leaders unless they are leading a team in a corporation, ministry or government office.

The reality is, mothers are some of the most influential leaders in our world.

We often hear stories about mothers who are using what they learn at The Global Leadership Summit (GLS) to be leaders and influencers in their families and beyond. For Jessamy Johnson, former interpreter for the US State Department in Africa, now mother of four foster kids (three siblings and a teenager) and one biological daughter, the GLS has been instrumental in providing leadership tools and encouragement as a mother.

“The Lord called my husband and me to the very heart of one of our country’s deepest needs – parenting vulnerable children through foster care,” says Jessamy. “I completely shifted gears and left behind my adventurous, world-traveling, fulfilling career to dive into what we call adventure parenting in our own home.”

The Summit speaks to parents.

“The Summit solidified the degree to which my husband and I have been called to a higher level of leadership—not only as individuals, but also as a couple, and as a family. We felt sparks of vision for the future and an excitement about the bigger-than-us things God has already called us to and may be stretching us toward in the future. We filled our arms with resources, devoured the messages and we’re spending time together in prayer and planning professionally and personally as a result of what the Spirit spoke to us through this event.”

Almost every speaker from the 2016 GLS provided takeaways Jessamy and her husband could use as parents.

Here are Jessamy’s seven most helpful GLS takeaways for parents:

  1. God treasures people most. When He entrusts us with His treasure, we must do everything possible to love and serve them well.

    As an adoptive mom, these words touched Jessamy’s heart. “Our first placement was a one-year-old girl, two-year-old boy and five-year-old boy,” says Jessamy. “On our journey, God told us we’d never send kids out of our home. They’d either go home to their birth family, which was our goal (to see whole families heal), or they’d stay home with us. We would never start kids down the path of moving from foster home to foster home.

    We also adopted a 15-year-old, and if there’s ever a time you want to believe God is in control and He’s got this, it’s when you adopt a teenager! But He’s got it. His way is the best way. And it’s best when we step out of the way!”

  2. If the leader looks worried, everyone will be worried. Have fun. Enjoy each other and the journey. – Alan Mulally

    “Adopted kids read everything that happens so carefully because they tend to stay hyper-vigilant. When they see the adults struggling, it is even scarier for them than for a kid raised in a stable environment. It was a good reminder to me to make self-care a priority and not let myself get run down or stressed. I don’t want to put on a show or be false in front of the kids, but I want to be a strong leader they can place confidence in when so many other leader figures have let them down.

    “We’re making sure we get the time together we need to strengthen our marriage and function well as a leadership united team.”

  3. You have to let your heart break. – Melinda Gates

    “Our hearts break every day for our kids,” Jesssamy shares. “You just can’t resist it or it’ll destroy you when it finally crashes down. Every day we have to face their pain so we have to let the tears come when they need to.”

  1. When people hear your vision, they should know the size and scale of your God. It should keep us awake at night and energized during the day. – Jossy Chacko

    “We have had incredible opportunities to share our story in our own city and recently to a broader audience through RE/MAX International,” Jessamy explains. “We absolutely love that Jeff’s entire real estate team has caught his passion and commitment to serving foster kids. Remembering to scale our expectations and dreams to God-sized ones, and not limiting Him is huge in parenting. God wants to do more than we can ask or imagine, so we’d better be asking and imagining big!”

  1. Do not over-goal. What are the fewest battles necessary to win the war? – Chris McChesney

    “This is a good question to ask ourselves, especially when dealing with pre-teens and teens!” Jessamy says.

  1. Veto but don’t dictate. People have to have their say, but they don’t have to have their own way. – Chris McChesney

    “Just listening to kids makes them feel empowered, gives them a voice and teaches them that later in life they’ll need to speak up,” says Jessamy. They also need to know we don’t always get our own way. It’s a fine balance between teaching kids to speak up and use their words, but to accept when the outcome is not what they hoped.”

  1. Add value to people. – John Maxwell

    “I loved how he outlined what followers (children) ask leaders (parents) and felt it especially apt to adopted kids who don’t innately feel the answers to the three questions the way biological kids do,” Jessamy explains. “He says they ask,

    ‘Do you like me?’ which gets at compassion. ‘Can you help me?’ which gets at competence. And ‘Can I trust you?’ which gets at character.

    “Adopted kids really aren’t sure about the answers to those questions and we are aware of that every single day. We compare our biological daughter’s level of confidence in our compassion for her, competence to meet her needs and character that we won’t let her down, to the expectations our adopted kids have that tell them adults don’t care, can’t do anything anyway and will let them down.”

The GLS is for every kind of leader.

“You absolutely cannot get the tools, resources, encouragement and wisdom you will get from the Summit for any better cost of time or money. It is worth every second and every penny and then some. Make time for it. Show up focused and ready to absorb. Whatever kind of a leader you are—parent, teacher, boss, manager, counselor, friend, neighbor—YOU influence others, and the sooner you accept that and take it seriously, the sooner you can be more effective, more powerful, more of a blessing to those around you. You’ll be blessed by doing whatever it is you do well and seeing people impacted by your choices, words and behaviors.

“The Spirit is alive and working, not just because some book says so, but because we’ve seen it with our own lives. What a gift to have a story that lends itself to sharing the Gospel story.

The Summit is a powerful time of reflection, growth and equipping for anyone who shows up ready and willing. There truly is no reason not to go. Once you go, you’ll be planning to go back and thinking about who you can bring with you!”

An Event That Changed the Way I See the World—2017 GLS Faculty Spotlight

Posted on July 20, 2017 by - News & Updates

Bryan Stevenson has been called one of World’s Greatest Leaders. He is committed to defending the poor and wrongly condemned, and has galvanized a movement to re-examine the roots of mass incarceration in America. His work in justice is fueled out of his willingness to get close to difficult problems and to do uncomfortable things. We are thrilled to welcome and learn from him at the Global Leadership Summit in 2017.

In this 3½-minute video, Bryan tells the story of how one inmate’s experience changed his leadership.

 

Guest faculty members are invited to participate in The Global Leadership Summit based on proven leadership abilities in their field of expertise. Their beliefs may not necessarily reflect those of Willow Creek Association and Willow Creek Community Church, and their presence at the Summit does not imply blanket endorsement of their views or affiliations.