Month: August 2020

GLS20 Session Notes: The Science of Leadership—Impacting for Good

GLS20 Vanessa Van Edwards Faculty Spotlight Article Header

The following are notes from Vanessa Van Edwards’ talk at #GLS20. Use them to help you apply the content you learned at the Summit.

Do leaders think differently? Vanessa Van Edwards teaches how to harness your own inner leader. Using the latest neuroscience and psychology she shows us how to make a great positive impact. The key is striking the perfect balance between warmth and competence. Leaders are able to build both trust and confidence with their verbal cues, nonverbal signals and their mindset. In this session, Vanessa gives us new strategies to feel empowered and empower those around you.

 

CONNECTION | Personality

  • Recovering awkward person
  • Social anxiety
  • Curiosity pulling her to study leaders
  • Spent the last decade at the Science of People studying the hidden forces that drive behavior
  • There are natural born leaders, but there are also naturally made leaders
What makes a leader?
  • Harvard Business School Research shows when we first see someone, we’re judging them on two different traits, warmth and competence.
  • When someone first sees you, the first thing they’re thinking is,
      • “Can I trust you?”= Warmth
      • “Can I respect you?”= Competence.
  • Most non-leaders have an imbalance in one of these traits.
  • A leader is someone ranks off the charts in both of these traits.
  • They’re both friendly and warm and collaborative, but also powerful, capable and dependable.
ASK YOURSELF:
  • Do I fall a little higher on the warm side where people see me as friendly, relatable and collaborative, but maybe they forget having met me before, or they forget my name.
  • Am I a little higher on the competent side where people see me as smart and capable, but I’ve been told I’m hard to talk to, intimidating or cold.
How To Get To The Center of the Scale?
Be Purposeful With Your Cues

CONNECTION | Brian’s Experiment:

  • Brian Wansink brought participants into his lab, and he turned off the lights and blindfolded them.
  • He handed them a bowl of strawberry yogurt.
  • All of the participants blindfolded ate the strawberry yogurt and then rated the yogurt on its strawberry flavor.
  • There was a catch, 59% of the participants said that the yogurt had a nice strawberry flavor, but the yogurt was actually chocolate.
  • This is the first of many experiments that demonstrate a powerful psychological phenomenon called priming.
Priming: When our words shape our actions, our behaviors and our thoughts.
  • They don’t only expect and change the thoughts and behavior of others, they also change the thoughts and behavior of ourselves.
  • We don’t realize the words we use are incredibly powerful.
  • We are constantly sending our words out into the world without realizing how they’re actually shaping what people hear and then how they act.
HOW TO | Prime an Email:

Example: Sending an email similar to this, “We’re all set for the meeting next week. I’ll prepare an overview and sample proposal for you, then we can review them. Let me know if you have any questions.”

  • Deemed boring and sterile—it does the job.
  • Change the email to think about how we want the recipient to feel and act.
  • This is only one more word than the last one, but it sounds different.

Update: “I’m looking forward to collaborating next week. I’ll prepare a goal worksheet and overview of desired outcomes for both of us. We can work through everything together. Happy to answer any questions.”

  • When you tell someone to collaborate or use the word “collaborate” they’re more likely to be collaborative.
  • Our calendar is one of our biggest primers for ourselves and others. We send calendar invites all the time: call, meeting, conference, one-on-one, agenda, etc.
  • Use words like, “collaborative session”, “strategy session”, “mastery meeting”, “creative time”, “accountability”, or “our goals session”.
  • Every time you share a word like goal, someone is more likely to think of their goals and then embody their goals.
ASK YOURSELF:

How do you want someone to think, feel and act before, during and after interacting with me?

CONNECTION | Appearing Friendly

  • Before interaction—especially before video calls or those phone calls think about one way to prime for positive.
      • “Oh, so happy to see you!”
      • “What great weather”
      • “I’ve been looking forward to this”
      • “It’s great to be here”
      • “It’s always such a pleasure to speak with you”
  • The brain hears, “happy”, “great”, “pleasure”, “looking forward”.
  • If you’re high on the competence side and want to be seen as more collaborative, more warm, more friendly and approachable, use more warm words in your communications.
      • Friends
      • Cheers
      • Together
      • Collaborate
      • Excited
      • Happy to be here
  • Change your email signature to prime the exact word you hope to use.
  • If you’re higher on the warm side, and want to be seen as more competent. Use more competent words like:
      • Productive
      • Brainstorm
      • Effective
      • Power through
      • Efficient
Do an email audit.
  • Open your email. Look at your last 10 emails you just sent.
  • Count the number of warm words and count the number of competent words.
  • You’ll be off the chats in one of those categories, you’ll have lots of warm words or lots of competent words, and you’ll realize, “Ah, that’s where I fall on the charisma scale.”
  • You might see no warm or competent words at all. And this means that you have gotten sterile with your communication.
  • We’re priming less and less and favoring this sterile neutral kind of communication. When we do this, we’re not setting people up for success.
Trust

Think about when you first meet someone. What part of the body do you look at first? Back in caveman days, the first place we looked was the hands to see if they were carrying a rock or a spear.

CONNECTION | Demonstration:

  • The best TED speakers come out on stage the same way—they come out waving their hands and this communicates “friend”.
  • Do this on video calls. Start with a wave.
  • Showing more hand gestures to support your content demonstrates trustworthiness and allows the audience you’re speaking with to trust you.
  • When you assume the best in others, they are most likely to rise to the occasion.
  • When you expect the best and you use warm and competent words with them, they’re more likely to then act as their best self.
HOW TO | Introductions:

Example: “Hi, Laura meet Sarah. Oh, we have Sarah on the call. Here’s that quick email intro to Sarah.”

This is sterile and not showcasing the person.

Update: “Sarah is our wonderful head of marketing. She’s been leading the team for five years and we are so lucky to have her”.

This does three things:

  1. Sets Sarah up for tremendous success.
  2. Changes the way that you see Sarah, because it’s setting you up to think, “How can I prime for her?”
  3. Influence.

CONNECTION | Study:

  • Doctors record 10 seconds of voice tone clips. “Hi, my name is Dr. Edwards and I specialize in oncology. I work at Children’s Presbyterian Hospital.”
  • They took these clips and they warbled the words. Then they asked people to rate these doctors on warmth and competence.
  • They found that the doctors who had the lowest warmth and competence ratings had the highest rates of malpractice lawsuits. This hints that we don’t sue doctors just based on their skills, we sue doctors based on our perception of their skills.
  • What were the patterns? Why is it that some doctors ranked off the charts in competence and warmth and others didn’t?
Question Inflection: When we go up at the end of our sentences.
  • Reserved for just questions.
  • People give away their power all the time.
  • When you go up on your ask, on your numbers, on your price, on your timeline, you are begging people to negotiate with you.
  • You’re saying, “I don’t really believe this number,” and neither should you.
  • Make sure that you are telling not asking.
Use the lowest end of their natural voice tone.
  • Tighten the vocal cords and limit the amount of space in the voice. Hear what tension sounds like when we’re tense as the voice and vocal cords become tight.
  • When tightening the voice, you can hear the anxiety.
  • When you breathe out and speak at the same time, forcing the vocal cords to open.
NEXT STEPS:
  • Practice saying “hello” on the out-breath.
  • Take a deep breath in and answer hello on the top.
  • Do this on the out-breath.
  • Record your next phone call and listen to see if you give away your confidence.

CONNECTION | UK Prime Minister:

  • William Gladstone and Benjamin Disraeli were running for prime minister in the UK.
  • A reporter took both men to lunch to see who would be better to be prime minister.
  • She wrote, “After sitting down with Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest person in England. But after sitting next to Mr. Disraeli, I thought I was the cleverest person in England”.
  • Mr. Disraeli won.
  • Be your warmest most competent self ,and let others be the warmest most competent version of themselves.
NEXT STEPS:

Watch additional training at ScienceofPeople.com/GLS

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GLS20 Illustrative Summaries

GLS20 Vanessa Van Edwards Illustrative Summary

The following illustrative summaries are from The Global Leadership Summit in 2020. Please feel free to use these illustrations to help you reflect on and apply what you learned. All illustrations by Melissa Whelan.

 

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Craig Groeschel 

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GLS20 Craig Groeschel Illustrative Summary

 

 

Marcus Buckingham

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GLS20 Marcus Buckingham Illustrative Summary

 

 

Nona Jones

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GLS20 Nona_Jones Illustrative Summary

 

Bishop T.D. Jakes

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GLS20 T.D. Jakes Illustrative Summary

 

Paula Faris

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GLS20 Paula Faris Illustrative Summary

 

 

Amy Edmondson

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GLS20 Amy Edmondson Illustrative Summary

 

Michael Todd

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GLS20 Michael Todd Illustrative Summary

 

Dr. Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic

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GLS20 Dr. Tomas Illustrative Summary

 

Rory Vaden

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GLS20 Rory Vaden Illustrative Summary

 

Vanessa Van Edwards

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GLS20 Vanessa Van Edwards Illustrative Summary

 

 

Sadie Robertson-Huff

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GLS20 Sadie Robertson-Huff Illustrative Summary

 

 

Lysa Terkeurst

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GLS20 Lysa Terkuerst Illustrative Summary

 

 

Beth Comstock

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GLS20 Beth Comstock Illustrative Summary

 

 

Kaká

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GLS20 Kaka Illustrative Summary

 

 

Albert Tate

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GLS20 Albert Tate Illustrative Summary

 

 

 

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GLS20 Session Notes: The Pace of Grace

Michael Todd will be joining the faculty at The Global Leadership Summit 2020.

The following are notes from Mike Todd’s talk at #GLS20. Use them to help you apply the content you learned at the Summit.

Striding
  • Stride means to walk with long decisive steps in a specific direction.
  • Why are we walking if we can run?
  • Why don’t we get there faster?
  • The pace of walking lasts longer.
  • When you find the right pace, everything changes.
  • The pace of grace.
ASK YOURSELF:
  • Is everything in your leadership moving at the same pace?
  • Do you have leadership unity?
  • Is your integrity, your health, your spirituality, your family, your character, your peace, your joy, and your fulfillment, are they working together in harmony, making a beautiful sound?
CONNECTION | Drumming:
  • Different parts going at once in union—synergy.
  • When you find the right pace, it’s easy for a team to follow you.
What have you been called to do?
  • What is that thing that wakes you up in the morning?
  • What is that thing that you are burdened with?
  • Stay on that thing with the level of pace that will be able to allow you to sustain.
  • We need leaders who will be here generation after generation changing the trajectory of the lives that have come before and lives that are coming after.
  • Sowing down the pace allows for mental and emotional availability.
  • Have margin in your life.
  • Find the pace that is sustainable and livable.
  • Poor pace produces missed moments, missed meaning and missed miracles.
If you do not find a pace, you will miss the moments that are supposed to bring joy.
  • You will miss the things you’re supposed to learn, the meaning that is supposed to be in it.
  • You’ll miss the miracles.
How do I set a new leadership pace?
1. Get A Vision
  • Get a vision of yourself rested and whole.
  • Vision is what you see when your eyes are closed.
  • Sight is what you see when your eyes are open.
2. Make It Visual
  • Write it down—nothing’s real until you write it down.
  • Write down the goal that, “This time next month, my pace is going to go to this. And this time, the month after that, by this time next year.”
  • Write it down, put it in your iPhone, put it on a tablet.
  • Once it becomes real, it’s written down.
3. Be Verbal
  • Tell somebody, “I’m changing my pace.”
  • Once you do that, don’t violate what you said.
  • The results are going to come.
  • Pace directly affects peace, and peace is true prosperity.
  • If you want true prosperity in your business and your life, you need peace.
  • If you need peace over a long period of time, you have to have a pace.
  • Success is not just where you end up, it’s how you get there.

 

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GLS20 Session Notes: The Most Surprising Hindrance to Innovation

GLS20 Lysa Terkeheurst Faculty Spotlight Article Header

The following are notes from Lysa TerKeurst’s talk at #GLS20. Use them to help you apply the content you learned at the Summit.

Never before has innovation been more critical for organizations than right now. So, what’s holding us back? Is it creativity? Resources? The right new hire? The answer might surprise you. Leaders who learn this skill not only experience more success at work, but more importantly, they have more fulfilling personal and family relationships as well. In this session, Lysa TerKeurst helps us rethink a skill we must all master in order to innovate—forgiveness.

 

Innovation is no longer just a good idea. It’s no longer just a needed skill for you and your employees. It is a matter of survival.

What is innovation?
  • Innovation is the mystery that someone on your team is dying to solve, if only you’ll make them feel safe enough to do so.
  • When people feel safe, they are so much more likely to take a risk.
  • When people feel unsafe, they take all that brilliant, educated, pregnant with possibility risk, and they tuck it into a folder labeled maybe one day.
  • A leader who can have access to those absolutely mind blowing innovative ideas, if only they knew the power of one surprising word.
What is this word? Forgiveness.
CONNECTION | Articles:
  • Forbes Article: “Forgiveness As A Business Tool”
      • Transformational leaders are acutely aware of the cost of animosity.
      • Leaders realize the habit created by an unforgiving attitude and holding grudges.
      • Holding grudges is a form of arrested development. It holds people back.
  • Forbes article, “Forgiveness: The Secret To Innovation,” says modern organizations cannot survive without people who yearn to take risk.
      • Knowing that your leader understands the shakiness of new ideas will forgive unsuccessful but earnest attempts at innovation. This means you’re in an organization that can become risk confident, instead of risk averse.
      • The non-forgiving boss is always partially creating an environment that suppresses innovation
      • The boss who can accurately and wisely know when to forgive, avoids the problem of scaring off innovative employees.
  • Inc.com article: “Forgiveness: A Key Tool for Business Success”
      • Executive character is based on four moral principles: integrity, responsibility, compassion and forgiveness.
      • Research goes on to say that organizations that have CEOs with high character ratings and those four qualities had an average return on assets of 9.35 over a two year period, which was five times higher than companies with CEOs of low character leadership.
  • The real payoff of forgiveness is that you deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you.
  • Your team deserves to know that instead of holding grudges, that you, their leader will hold space for grace.
  • Trade pain for perspective.
  • Exchange wounding for wisdom.
CONNECTION | Her Story:
  • Starting Proverbs 21 Ministries
  • 2016: 3 of 5 kids were engaged and getting married
  • January 2016 she prayed God would prepare her heart
  • Discover her husband’s unfaithfulness
  • Started seeing a Christian counselor
  • They had a one day intensive to work through forgiveness and what it looked like
  • Thought forgiveness was something to be worked on later in life after the person who hurt her was sorry or learned from the mistake
  • She was looking for evidence of the other person’s suffering because of her pain
  • It never seems to be the perfect day for forgiveness
Forgiveness Is a Decision and a Process:
  • Forgiveness isn’t giving permission to the other person to continue to hurt you.
  • Forgiveness isn’t for the other person.
  • Forgiveness is the only way for you to sever the suffering.
  • Ask yourself, “Do I want to heal?”
  • Today’s a great day to start working on forgiveness.
  • Forgiveness is a decision and it’s not tied to another person.
How To Begin Forgiving:
1. Start With The Pain
  • Counselor handed her a stack of three by five cards.
  • Write out each way that you have been hurt, or wronged, or traumatize, or caused pain.
  • Name the ways and the situations that hurt and caused the feeling of wrong and pain.
  • When the pain is expressed, go card by card, by card, and say, I forgive the person for this.
  • It’s okay if the feelings aren’t caught up to the words in this moment and the forgiveness doesn’t happen in this moment.
  • Often feelings will be the very last thing to sign on to forgiveness.
  • Understand whatever feelings will not yet allow for, the blood of Jesus will surely cover.
  • Take a piece of red felt and for each card this is said, place the red felt on top of. Go card by card doing this.
2. Recognize Jesus Has Already Done The Forgiving
  • Forgiveness is made possible by cooperation with what Jesus has already done.
  • Again say, “I forgive for this, and whatever my feelings will not yet allow for the blood of Jesus will surely cover.”
  • Matthew 6:9
  • When God’s forgiveness flows to us, and we refuse to let it then flow through us, that heavy weight of unforgiveness is the weight of anxiety, and fear and chaos.
  • Jesus knew part of our everyday prayer needs to be confession.
  • Letting God’s forgiveness flow to us, and then forgiveness as we let it flow through us, and as we forgive those who have created debts with us.
  • Forgiveness is supposed to be as much a part of our everyday life as eating and sleeping and praying and believing.

CONNECTION | Proverbs 31 Ministries:

  • Approach forgiveness as a daily routine
  • Forgiveness creates safety for our teams.
  • Forgiveness creates peace and joy in our own hearts.
  • Leadership values
3. Create Values

CONNECTION | Family Values

  • Years before the unfaithfulness, Lysa and her husband created family value.
  • Getting off the blank page is worthy work.
  • No Idea is a dumb idea.
  • The minute you say that there are dumb ideas, people are afraid that they’re going to be the one that throws out the ultimate dumb idea.
  • Instead of wording it that way we worded it getting off the blank pages worthy work.
  • Every idea is worth the work.
  • Communicating “you’re safe to be innovative here.”
  • We give grace because we desperately need it.
  • This is a safe place for imperfect progress.

CONNECTION | Coming Home:

  • Lysa’s husband asked for forgiveness and came home 2.5 years later.
  • God strengthened the relationship and restored it.
  • Forgiveness paves the road for redemption no matter how our story goes.
  • Story of Melissa joining the team and launching the online Bible study surpassing 2500 people registered.
  • The best time to forgive is before we’re ever offended. The next best time is right now.
4. Write A Leadership Declaration
  • Decide the ones who hurt you, no longer get to limit you, label you or lure you into becoming hard-hearted.
  • The sum total of your one incredible life—it must not be reduced to the limitations of living hurt.
  • Leadership means people love you until they don’t, but if they betray you and leave you and take from you, don’t willingly hand over your integrity as well.
  • Do not waste your energy on simmering resentments. Don’t prove them right by now acting wrong.
  • Their exit may have just given you the very things needed to usher you and your team to your greatest idea.
  • Innovation requires necessity and resistance.
  • Forgive the one that hurt you and maybe even thank them and wish them well.
  • They did not stop you, they propelled you.
  • Declare, “I’m free to forgive so that I can live and discover and create and innovate.”
  • You deserve to stop suffering because of what someone else has done.
  • Today, make the choice to forgive.
  • You and your decision to forgive is not tied to them and neither is your healing.
NEXT STEPS:
  • Take out a piece of paper or a card and write a few words or sentences about what happened.
  • Your pain matters.
  • Include whatever it is that you need to state because what happened mattered.

CONNECTION | Seeing Your Pain:

  • What happened matters.
  • It matters so much that if no one else in this world has ever dared to bear witness to your pain I will.
  • I believe it.
  • I believe you were hurt.
  • I believe what they did to you was wrong.
  • If no one else has ever said that they’re sorry, I will.
  • I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry for what happened.
  • Be brave and courageous and set yourself free from all the hurt and pain.
NEXT STEPS:
  • Write on that piece of paper or cards, “I forgive this person for all this pain that they caused me, and whatever my feelings will not yet allow for the blood of Jesus will surely cover.”
  • This is your marked moment. You have forgiven and no one can take it away from you.
  • Fold the card symbolizing we have now closed that chapter. There are so many new chapters waiting to be written. There’s beauty inside of you and creativity, and the greatest innovation that you have ever known.

GLS20 Session Notes: Leadership that Meets the Moment

GLS20 Albert Tate Faculty Spotlight Article Header

The following are notes from Albert Tate’s talk at #GLS20. Use them to help you apply the content you learned at the Summit.

The world brings challenges—challenges that seem to confound the wise, contend to break up communities, divide societies—These challenges often seem insurmountable. Challenges that disrupt and devastate have to be met with strong, vigilant and authentic leadership. In this session, Albert Tate identifies the marks of authentic leadership that will proactively confront the moments of our world’s crisis. He gives us a picture of how you can lead out of a place of authenticity with the courage to stand in opposition to injustice, the humility to love and serve both friends and enemies, and marked by vulnerability, weakness, and loss. As a leader, this is our call—changing, pushing, redefining and overcoming life’s challenges.

 

CONNECTION | Elijah McCoy:

  • May 2nd, 1844 Elijah McCoy was born in Ontario, Canada.
  • The son of fugitive slaves who courageously escaped from their plantation in Kentucky.
  • Traversed the underground railroad, making their way north.
  • Elijah was brilliant and studied in Edinburgh, Scotland.
  • Became a licensed mechanical engineer.
  • Made his way back to the USA but because of the racial climate and obvious racial tension of that day, he could not work as a mechanical engineer.
  • He had to settle for a lesser position as an oilman at Michigan Central Railroad.
  • The locomotive was the driving force in the economy.
  • Elijah was frustrated with the locomotive oil process, and said, “there must be a better way to do this. We’ve got to find a better way to do this.”
  • He spent months researching and created the McCoy lubricating cup.
  • Other companies tried making it, but they were terrible. This began the question at purchasing of asking, “is this a counterfeit or is this the real McCoy? Is it a counterfeit, or is this the real McCoy?
  • Sometimes we start looking at other people, you start looking at these other messages, you start looking at this stuff, and you come to a gathering like this and we spend these days together, and you wonder if all these principles I’m trying to grab and I’m trying to grab and we run the risk of going home being the best version.
  • There’s a tension to wrestle with.
How do we go home taking all these ideas and becoming the best?
  • Leadership isn’t something outside of that we have to grasp, but something inside of we have to grow.
  • Authentic leadership is leadership that dwells within and leadership that is grown, that is cultivated. It is not something that we’re trying to do outside of us.
  • Leadership isn’t something we do; leadership is something that we are.
  • It needs to flow authentically from within because when we face the world’s crisis and when we see all the stuff, pandemic, racial unjust, unrest, and all the stuff that’s happening in the world, this moment demands that leadership show up and meet it. A
  • When leadership shows up to meet it, we don’t need to try to go find it, it needs to already be inside of us

CONNECTION | Matthew:

  • In the book of Matthew, Jesus goes to the temple.
  • Jesus arrives and people are not there worshiping. Tables set up and there are money changers at the table in place of where worship should be taking place.
  • Not only are they doing deals, but they’re doing deals marked with injustice towards the poor, the marginalized, those that are considered the least of these.
  • When you get worship wrong, when you treat God the wrong way, you’re inevitably going to treat his people the wrong way.
  • Jesus is angry. He flips over the table.

Leadership Essentials To Grow In Authenticity:

1. Flip Tables Of Injustice
  • Flip the tables of injustice leaders.
  • Be leaders who are looking for systems of injustice to turn them over.
  • It’s hard to flip a table of injustice if you’re sitting comfortably at it.

ASK YOURSELF:

  • Am I comfortably sitting at a table that should be flipped because of the system of injustice?
  • Am I sitting in places where I should be flipping because of the injustice?
  • Are there people that should be at the table?
  • Are there people that should have access?
  • Are there people that should be there, but because of the system that you operate in, they’re not there?
  • Who’s not at my table?
  • Where are they if they’re not at my table?
  • Why aren’t they here?
  • Have I made systems that make it hard for them to get here?
  • Who’s missing?

CONNECTION | Daughter Bethany:

  • When Bethany was learning her colors, she was also learning church songs. Jesus loves the little children, confusing her because not all the colors were included that she was learning at school.
  • She said, “Red and yellow, black and white. Oops. They forgot purple.
  • We facilitate the spaces that we participate in,
  • Let’s ask the question,” where’s purple?” In our organization and our teams and our community.
  • Are there people that are left out?
  • Where are there those that are missing?
  • Do you realize how much change we can make if everybody asked themselves the question, “Where’s purple? Where’s purple?”
  • Jesus flipped over tables, not people. He flips over systems, not people.

CONNECTION | Story in John:

  • Jesus’ preparation for crucifixion.
  • Jesus washed everyone’s feet.
2. Wash People’s Feet
  • Just because you’re wrong doesn’t mean you’re worthless.
  • Just because you’re wrong doesn’t mean you don’t have worth, or you don’t have value.
  • Just because you’re wrong doesn’t mean you get to get canceled. Cancel culture is not Christian culture. If Jesus didn’t cancel Judas, I can’t cancel you.
  • Authentic leadership serves and washes the feet of both enemies and allies.
  • How do I apply this to my business?

How do I apply this?

  • We need leaders that’ll flip over systems of injustice, and we need leaders to wash the feet, both their allies and their enemies.
  • Show them compassion.

CONNECTION | Story of Jacob:

  • Jacob wanted the birthright and inheritance of his father, but it wasn’t for him.
  • His mom was an accomplice and he takes the birthright from his brother, deceiving his father.
  • Jacob was the guy who always won, and he got what he wanted.
  • Rachel’s dad manipulated and tricked him.
  • His brother Esau comes to him as his past catches up. Jacob is scared. He took his family and he split them up just in case Esau wanted to kill them.
  • Jacobs is waiting to meet Esau and an angel comes and immediately Jacob begins wrestling him. He’s wrestling with God. He’s wrestling and trying to win because he’s trying to do it in his own power.
  • Jacob had enough wins to be confident—to be arrogant, overcompensating and overconfident in his own ability.
  • He had no idea what it was like to be wrong.
  • This divine being said, “All right, this is enough.” And he hit him on the hip, dislocating it. But, Jacob was still holding on.
  • “I’m done, but you’re not.”
  • God is not done with you. If you have breath in your body, you have purpose in your chest.
  • Jacob’s name change and the limp were a reminder of God’s grace.
  • The loss wasn’t a sign of failure, it was a sign of God’s grace.
  • Sam Collier: “when your story meets God’s story, he’ll give you a greater story”.
  • Leader, don’t lose your limp. We need more limping leaders. We need leaders walking in vulnerability.
  • “Failure isn’t a loss with God. You can still win if you learn and if you surrender and if you give up and if you trust him.” Failure isn’t fatal. Failure is an invitation for God’s grace to show up in your life.
3. Limping Leaders

A limp marks where you lost, and God won.

CONNECTION: Limping

  • Hamilton scene reference
  • Leadership has to live beyond this moment.
  • There may be a harvest we don’t reap.
  • His Bishop mentor says, “Moses would see further than he would go. And Joshua would go further than he would see.”
  • Be a legacy limping leader.

CONNECTION | Disney Half Marathon:

  • Ran a Disney half marathon. First time running, he was on the porch when his kids came home from school, they didn’t say anything but walked past him going to their mom saying, “dad’s going to die”.
  • He practiced and would try to get it together and try to work it out.
  • During the marathon a little lady came up beside him, and said, “you got this.” She could see the terror and repeated “you got this.”
  • You don’t win because you come in first. You win because you finish.
  • As followers of Jesus Christ we believe one day we’ll finish this race and we’ll stand before God and he’ll give us a reward. He’ll say, “You’re not getting this reward because you came in first. You’re not getting this reward because you’re the fastest. You’re getting this reward because you finished. You flipped, you washed, and you limped to the finish.”
NEXT STEPS:
  • Lead from a place of authenticity.
  • Lead as leaders who flip over systems of injustice.
  • Lead as leaders who wash the feet of friend and foe- enemy and ally.
  • Lead as leaders limping as a sign of what we lost and how God won.
  • Authentically lead to the finish.

 

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GLS20 Session Notes: How to Lead Through Life’s Reset

GLS20 Paula Faris Faculty Spotlight Article Header

The following are notes from Paula Faris’ talk at #GLS20. Use them to help you apply the content you learned at the Summit.

Every leader’s life has twists and turns. If you haven’t had one yet, you soon will. As you navigate these changes, whether you’re shifting career paths, or feeling stuck, Paula Faris helps us move forward and lead through life’s resets. She explores how to navigate these shifts and help us lead others who may be going through their own transitions. In this session, Paula helps us gain clarity on when to proceed when faced with life’s twists and turns, what to expect and how to navigate well.

 

CONNECTION | TV:

  • Don’t bury the lead.
  • Don’t bury the lead story.
  • Not burying the lead means you’re not excluding the most pertinent, important aspect of the story.
  • Don’t limit yourself.
  • Tragedy and opportunity can and do coexist.
Leading Yourself Through Life’s Reset:
  1. If you have peace, proceed.
  2. Expect and anticipate fear.
  3. Give yourself permission to branch out.
How do you know you’re being led in another direction?
1. Ask yourself, “do I have peace about it?”
  • If you have peace, proceed.
  • Paula walked away from her dream job.
  • The professed values she held onto were important to her.
  • Her faith was integrated into her story.
  • God was calling her out of a space where she had become addicted to a job, where she had found her significance, her worth, her identity in doing, but she was just too scared to walk away.

Why was she scared to walk away?

  • She was scared of what people would think
  • She was scared of being a failure and a “has- been.”

CONNECTION | Series of Tragedy:

  • Miscarriage
  • Concussion
  • Car crash
  • Influenza turned pneumonia.
  • She realized and said, “God allowed a series of personal tragedies to slow me down.”
  • Fear still had a grip.
  • “What good is it for a man to gain the world, but to lose his soul?”

Ask Yourself:

  1. Are your values clashing with the choices that you’re making, the choices professionally and personally?
  2. Are you finding significance in things that shift, like your job, like your status on Instagram, like your bank account, or perhaps in your relationships?

It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone, yourself included. If you have peace about something in your spirit, proceed. If you don’t, you have to stop.

Often we tell ourselves, if I’m scared about it, isn’t that my gut telling me to back off, to stop?

  • No. Fear is the great paralyzer.
  • Fear wants nothing more than to paralyze your purpose and to slay your dreams.
2. Expect And Anticipate Fear
  • Fear is normal.
  • Fear is not something that you conquer.
  • It is not something that you’re miraculously healed from or cured of.
  • Fear is normal for everybody. There’s nothing wrong with you if you’re feeling fear, but that fear that you feel and the peace that’s in your spirit, they can and they do coexist, just like tragedy and opportunity can coexist.
  • Fear and peace are not mutually exclusive.
  • MLK Jr: “Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.”
  • What if that staircase leads to nowhere?
  • The key is knowing how to deal with and channel your fear.

What is the absolute worst thing that could happen if you stepped out in faith, if you pressed into your fear right now, if you put your foot on that one, single stair?

Maybe it doesn’t work out.

NEXT STEPS: Write down the following to reflect and meditate.

  • What are you scared of?
  • What is the worst thing that could happen if you went for it?
  • What is the best thing that could happen if you went for it?
  • We often go to the negative. Think about the positive.
  • Change your point of view—change your paradigm—then think about the times where you allowed your fear to absolutely cripple you, to buckle your knees and paralyze you.
  • When did you not allow your fear to paralyze or to cripple you?
  • Do you remember how invigorating that felt?
  • Do you remember how confident you were when you pressed into your fear? You had no regrets that you didn’t go for it.

CONNECTION | Jeff Bezos:

  • Amazon founder
  • “It might not work out since most start-ups don’t.”
  • He shared the idea with his boss.
  • “I would always be haunted by a decision to not try at all.”
3. Branching Out
  • Give the people on your team the permission to branch out.
  • Let go of the trap.
  • How many times have we limited ourselves?
  • Fear is when we can’t see something else for ourselves. And we absolutely question whether others would accept us in a different capacity.

CONNECTION | Identity Crisis:

  • Leaving GMA
  • Questioning who she is
  • Hard not to do what society says
  • Learning who she is outside of what she did
  • Purpose isn’t in doing or working
  • Multidimensional

ASK YOURSELF:

  1. What am I good at?
  2. What do I love?
  3. What do trusted people around you notice that you’re good at and you love?

CONNECTION | Missing It:

  • Being good at “it” and not loving “it” is missing peace.
  • Peel back your layers and use your answers to the questions to help you.
  • Talk to people you trust and have them answer, too.
  • Notice what you’re good at and what you love—they don’t have to be linear.
  • Tragedy and opportunity can coexist.
  • Release yourself. Then grant yourself the permission to branch out based upon your unique gifts and talents.
  • Don’t bury the lead to your life story. It is up to you to be bold, to be courageous, to lead yourself and to lead others in this moment of reset.

 

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